Skip to main content

No place to call home….

By
Image source:http://stuffpoint.com/nature/image/250515-nature-endless-journey.jpg


My decision to move ahead in life was a bed of thorns in itself. I knew it would not be an easy journey to establish myself as a totally different person amongst a crowd of talented individuals, but I was firm in my resolve. I left behind everything, which a person calls own and set my foot on a rekindling journey, without a second thought.  

That was an opportunity for me, a blessing which I sought for long. No prayer goes in vain; you just need to stand strong to show your dedication to your goal. The same was the case with me. The things I wished for long seemed in reach, from where I stood at that time…. It was like a dream come true…

But no matter how big, happiness is always momentary. What is permanent is gloom… And to overcome the gloom and sadness that hides in the crest of our heart, persistence, patience and self-satisfaction is the key determinant. Everyone feels sadness in some form or the other, many times in a month, but what matters the most is our ability to fight it back. 

I discovered the power of self-satisfaction a while ago when I found out that accumulation of achievements, fame and money was not my life goal. All I wanted was a sense of satisfaction and belongingness in whatever I do and wherever I lived. 

Over the years, I might have succeeded in attaining a state of self-satisfaction, but one thing continued to haunt me and this fear keeps on growing each day. The feeling of detachment: detachment from my surroundings, workplace, people and the place where I live.

Suddenly it seems that the whole idea of a dream and the journey of fulfilling your dreams are so shallow. In the journey to reach our dream, we keep on moving and on the way, we keep on moving away from things which one had an important place in our lives. I never regret the decisions I take, but sometimes I feel so alone, so empty. When I say that I have no place to call home, I want to read my heart out aloud that no matter what I do, no matter how close it might be to my heart, I feel so detached with everything. I am unable to find a purpose, a reason for my actions lately. 

I see friends becoming nostalgic when someone mentions home and family when I feel no such attachment to any place. I feel alone and am completely comfortable with the idea. I am not even cribbing about not having a place to call home, but for once, hollowness shakes me too. Many would think while reading, where did my home go? It is at the same place, where it has been for years. In a quaint surrounding of a small city, but I do not feel like visiting the place. 

Maybe, there is a feeling which I have either lost in the journey or have not even discovered. But I do not feel nostalgic about anything now. For once, I wish to experience the happiness which I see on a person’s face who talks about his/her home.

I am strong and determined, but now I wish to slow down and would love to have an idea of the beauty of lives. But I guess I am at the far end of this journey, still in the middle, where my vision does not allow me to have a clear view of where I am headed to, neither I am able to see what I left behind.
My journey continues…. like a nomad, in search of own self…

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

On a path to glory

By
I have been lost before. in a pool of confusions, that delve inside my head. I have been lost before, in a tide of self-doubt, that crept inside my heart.. I have been lost before, in the guilt of underperforming I have been lost before, at nights with unstoppable mourning Through the years I learned, it does not matter If I am lost, I will surely be found And if no one finds me, I myself will one day walk past this maze To do something worthwhile and to amaze All those who laughed at the time when I was lost All those who created a sense of self-doubt, who made me face this ghost I have learned that the fears are just inside All we have is a beautiful world with opportunities, that is real and is outside So, I rise again from this pool of confusion, Yes I rise again from this guilt and emotion, I know am hard at heart when it comes to the topic of self-achievement But what is an achievement, without a little attitude All I want you is to kno...
Post a Comment
Read more

How corporate professionalism helped me in learning the art of self-appreciation?

By
It’s been a long while that I wrote something for myself. Though being a full-time content writer, busy in playing with words all day long, who people think of as a word-wizard- never short of something to write, I have, of late, fell short of words to define what I feel about my passion. I started off as a content writer & still, I am that- it’s not that my passion has faded, it is still strong and growing every day, still I sometimes feel I am not doing much for myself. Writing every day for brands and companies- fuelling their aspirations to grow more and more through advertisements, e-mailers, marketing collaterals, etc., I have somehow felt guilty of not helping myself much with my growth journey. But is it my fault… or is it just situational? I am not the type who shifts the blame to professional or personal condition, so I take it upon myself for my mistake. I have not been much serious about my journey, passion and efforts. But through my realization, I came up wit...
Post a Comment
Read more

THE HYPE BEHIND FYUP

By
The Four Year Undergraduate Program that was due to be implemented from this session in the Delhi University have come under great criticism and scrutiny from various social as well as student groups in the recent days. The events have led to the creation of such circumstances that have led to the offer of resignation from the Chancellor of DU. The hype created over this issue have affected the future decisions of thousands of students who wish to take admission in the Delhi University after completing their schooling. What is FYUP? The four year undergraduate program is ought to be a visionary concept by the Chancellor of Delhi University that is bound to change the way Indian student learns after their schooling. The current system of the undergraduate program offers bachelor degree after three years of studies. The new system is set to convert the traditional 3 year program into a more holistic one that is spread over four years with the first year entirely dedicated t...
Post a Comment
Read more